...i miss YOU...

hey...

I MISS YOU En. Ronald...

its been a a fews day i didnt meet you..

but i feel like its a month havent seen u..

i miss hugging you...

i miss seeing ur smile..

i miss hearing your jokes..

but most of all i miss u teasing me..

haizz!!! cant stand with this feels..

do you miss me like i do..??

wish you here..

Take a good care..

get well soon..

I LOVE YOU so much!!!

.~ Today is HIS birthday!! ~

Hey!!..

its your birthday lar!!..

" HAPPY BIRTHDAY EN. RONALD!!"

23 yrs old ody...

and me will be 26 yrs this coming mac..

see the different??

hee...people ask me how can i fall in love with some younger than me..

i dunno how to answer...i only tell them " LOVE IS BLIND"

its appear no matter what situation..

honestly..

last time i really anti wit a guy who is younger than me..

i 'll ignore them becoz of that AGE..

hahahah! jahatkan..

but...

see what happen to me now..

im in love with him..and i didnt see the age anymore...

He really makes me forgot whatever i dislike..

i turn to someone that i also didnt expect i would be..

what i know now is i love that guy no matter what!

Si Hubby,

sori i didnt prepare ur present!..

i forgot..my fault..

sori again for didnt sings u a birthday songs last nite..

my bad!!..malu..:((

and im really sorry for not at ur side this moment..

i wish i was there...taking care of you...

get well soon..:))

i hope that all your dream come true..

more hapiness..

more love..

more matured..

more funny..

more handsome..hahahha! ( jokes! - i love you the way u are)

but dont too slim aahh!..heheheh!

AMEN!!

~ i take this chance to say " I LOVE YOU!" - its not enough actually..i do everything just to make u happy~

p/s: Miss u so much!!..i wish to celebrate it wit u..:))

..New Hair..

New Hair!!

He says i look like MUMMY..

hahahhah! jahat oo kan...

biar la..even im not 100% statisfied but i still like it..

1st time try this kind of style..so i'll accept the result..

and 1 thing they say aftr look at me is..

" Rain, you look more chubby like this.."

hee..yep! i admit it!

p/s: En. Ronald..thanks sebab temankan saya kelmarin..walaupun hubby says honey look like mummy still i like to hear it..i love you!..i'll never forget that moments..i enjoy the whole day!

..i cant be someone else..

cant sleep..so many things on my minds...

( just finished crying actually)..

dunno how to be strong this time..

same problem~

tired....

i wanna try to just say ' I DONT CARE'..

but its not me coz i care everything...

sometimes im asking myself..

" why is it happen in my life.."

" why i have 'MYSELF' now.."

~ a woman that always makes others feel bored..~

im sorry for that...

i just cant be someone else...this is me..im trying my best..

but theres sometimes that i like to let me be just MYSELF..

"saya SOMBONG.."

"saya EGO.."

"saya KERAS HATI.."

i admit it all..

accept me or not thats your jobs..

i wont force you...

Huh...! hati saya kacau saat ni..

tetau kenapa..its always ended like this..with the same reason.

.im tired actually...i feel like wanna give up!..

im really EMO tonight..sedih sangat2..

if only i can tell someone what i feel right now kan best..

tapi i cant coz im not that kind of person..

honestly, i surrender for that..thats not me..:((

LORD, give me strength to face it all..

if SOMEDAY what i dream is not a dream anymore..i'll accept it..

if SOMEDAY i dont have the fairytale..i'll accept it

but if that ' SOMEDAY' wont come up..i'll be the happiest person..

hopefully...i just wanna wish that SOMEDAY the dream & fairytale is MINE forever..

p/s : Hey, YOU - sorry if i always makes u feel bored , mad or whatever..i admit it..my fault..:((

~ HATI & CINTA ~

~ sakit perut..sengugut..ngilu..marah..~
di combine kan dalam satu hal yg sudah lumrah bagi seorang perempuan...
penat actually tapi kena terima hakikat.. itu makna nya saya perempuan tulen..:))

mukadimah yang langsung teda kaitan dengan tajuk kat atas..hee
saja je nak kongsikan kat korang feeling saya time nie..

~ HATI & CINTA ~ dua perkataan yang berbeza tapi punya kaitan yang sama..
saya bukan nya arif sangat pun bab2 HATI & CINTA..
sedangkan saya sendiri pun selalu gagal dlam hal ni...
saya belajar dari orang lain...
saya kenali maksud nya melalui cerita kawan2..

im starting my JIWANG feels already!!..layannn..~!!
VALENTINE'S DAY~ akhirnya tahun ni 14hb berlalu pada saat saya bukan SINGLE..:))
no CANDLE LIGHT dinner , no ROSES , no PRESENT only a KISS ..:))
(upss!! is it sound 18sx??..) ~ depends on you to think..yg pasti i know what happen..
and i love that so much!!!

Actually, im waiting for a ROMANTIC valentine's day for so long before..
( angan2 time zaman sekolah)..
tapi bila meningkat dewasa dan sudah faham erti sebenar, VALENTINE'S is just like another day but a little bit special for me...
its true that some people says VALENTINE is everyday...
yang penting HATI & CINTA kita itu hanya untuk DIA..

Huh!! adeiii..im starting missing Him..
Everytime when im missing him damn much i'll open this blog..
just to hear the songs while looking at that picture..
any post that i posted here is connected to Him..
( OuChh..!! perut ku sakit lagii!!)
erkk..sambung nanti lar...
this pain spoiling my mud..:((
See yah!!

p/s : En. Ronald..im missing you like crazy..i try not too think too much of it but its hurting me more...huh! i scared i might lose you every minute..i wish that time flies fast so THE DAY will come soon and i dont have to have this feels..~jealous & hurt~ im sorry if this is too much but for sure im scared a lot than you ever think..dont ask me why i love u coz my feels unexplained by words you can see it through my heart if you really wanna know.. i love you more everyday!!.~

~ Anda CANTIK?? ~

kamu memang CANTIK..
suma orang juga bilang begitu..
anda bangga??..
buat apa??...
mungkin orang akan cemburu bila tengok kamu..
tapi saya tidak akan...
saya TIDAK CANTIK...
saya mengaku...tapi dari segi lain mungkin saya lagi cantik..
sepa tau kan...
banyak benda kita perlu ada dalam diri..

Terus terang..saya memang suka tengok perempuan CANTIK + SEKSI..
tapi saya tidak suka tgk perempuan yang guna keCANTIKan + keSEKSIan
untuk minta perhatian...sungguh memalukan bagi saya...
jadi lar diri sendiri...jangan anggap kamu CANTIK suma org akan terus
'berhenti' dan memandang kamu...
tidak suma orang akan buat begitu...
mungkin ada satu ketika kamu begitu POPULAR..
tapi kamu harus ingat satu benda..
' DUNIA BERPUTAR'
makna nya..ada satu ketika itu kamu akan di BAWAH..
so pandai2 lar bangun dan bediri sendiri...
jangan asyik salah kan orang atas kejatuhan diri sendiri..
itu semua datang dari kamu..

suda masanya kita keluar dari diri kita yang dulu...
jangan lagi EGO!!..KERAS HATI..!! SOMBONG..!!
cuba terima kenyataan bahawa tidak semua orang d dunia akan berpihak pada kita selamanya..
dan satu benda yang perlu kamu tahu.. CANTIK tidak menjamin kamu dapat apa yg kamu ingin kan...

jangan biarkan orang rasa BOSAN melihat diri kita yang CANTIK..
sebab bagi saya CANTIK itu bukan pada wajah...
tapi CANTIK itu bila saya rasa saya selesa dan happy bersama..

Semua orang CANTIK pada persfektif yang berbeza...
kamu yang mana satu???
Discover it by yourself...
everyone is BEAUTIFUL cuma orang bodoh saja akan gelar orang lain UGLY..

kekadang saya bosan mendengar orang CANTIK yang perasaan lebih..
bagi saya sudah cukup jika saya tahu saya CANTIK walaupun hakikatnya saya tidak..
tapi kenapa ada orang yang 'ANGKAT BAKUL SENDIRI'..
cukup2 lar kamurang bah...suma orang tahu muka kamu itu CANTIK..
kenapa tidak mendedahkan keCANTIKan dalaman diri kamu...
haizzzz!!!..

( Today i increase my sins by judging YOU!! whatever..!! im actually really tired reading all your words..im sorry..my words also too much but i just cant stand reading the words that you repeat again and again..)

p/s : Di tujukan khas untuk DIRI SENDIRI and KAMU ( refering to everyone outside ) - kalau terasa sorry yer...i just say wat i wanna says...

Deactive Facebook???..

bosan!!
geram!!!
hipokrit!!
temberang!!
bikin sakit hati!!
thats what i feel when i open it!!

Feel wanna deactive Facebook soon...

...HATI kenapa sedih sangat nie??...

Nangis.

Hati sayu sangat awal pagi nie...

tadi kat FB aku sempat belek2 gambar lama...

tetiba..mata tertumpu pada wajah seseorang yg sgt di rindui..

air mata keluar lagi..

rindu sangat2 dengan dia...

11 tahun dia tinggal kan kami..

satu masa yg sangat lama...

we're grown up already Dad!!..Miss u much..

huh..! air mata mengalir lar...

keluar sebanyak mungkin...cuci segala kesedihan aku masa ini...

entah la...tetau kenapa ari ni rasa nak nangis jak..

sakit ati , rindu , marah , sedih & happy...

tetambah2 dengan mimpi buruk semalam..

suma campur sekali...

tapi yang nyata.. aku rindu sangat dengan Mendiang..

rindu sgt2...susah nak explain...

kalau di beri peluang nak sangat peluk dia...

nak bagi tau dia semua kesedihan & masalah hidup yg melanda..

rindu nak dengar nasihat dia...

wanna says :-

" Dad, I have Boyfriend already.."

" Dad, I hate them..i feel angry.."

" Dad, I'm Happy..i laugh a lot today.."

" Dad, i cant handle this problem..tell me wat to do.."

i wish i can tell Him all..But..

i Missed the chances to says it...He Gone too past..

Dad, May Your soul Rest in peace there..

sorry im not a good daughter..

i always do mistake..

i know you always look after us there..

we miss you so much..!

Hope to share you all our happiness & joys..

wish u are here...

Thanks For everything you ever do...

Hugs & Kisses for you Forever...

( This Post i dedicated to My beloved Dad : R.I.P Nasip Alap )

p/s : En. Ronald you makes me feel complete...honestly, you light up my days..Love u..!

..SaLah Saya Ka??..

kenapa tiap kali saya yg dipersalahkan...
tapi bila mereka yang berada dalam situasi saya..
tidak pula saya salahkan mereka...
mesti saya saja ka yang perlu faham mereka tapi mereka tidak..
saya bosan..!!!

"...mentang2 ada BF kawan di lupakan lar..."
hate this words so much!!!!...
salah ka bila saya ada BF..
kenapa mereka tidak fikir masalah lain time tu..
bikin sakit hati!!!!!!!!

sa pun tetau kenapa saya ada kawan macam tu...
pentingkan diri sendiri!!
mau saya fahami mereka...
tapi salahkan saya macam sa bunuh org!!!..
apa punya kawan cam tu...
cuma tahun ni saja sa tidak terjoin CNY wit them..
tapi mereka berlagak macam sudah bertahun2 sdh sa tidak join..!!!
arggghhhhh!!
sa benci ni keadaan!!! buat sa dalam keadaan serba salah!
Whatever!!!!!...
biarla kamu!!..saya malas nak fikir pasal korg punya problems..
problems sa lagi banyak..menambah kn stress jak d awal pagi...

huh!!!!...Chill Rain..!! tarik nafas...
lega??...nope...its seems sa mo marah mereka depan2..
gila..!!