its 2.30am...my eyes dont want to close..still fresh!! ni la ni penyebab red eyes kali kan...hee.. this would be my last post on this years...i post it early coz i know i would been busy on 31st Dec..hee..
2010 - mY toughest year..teach me a lot of things..i think i know how life is in this years..i got so many feeling..pain , Down , Lost , & happy with love...
My early years was really tough & hard..i feel the pain and its hurt me most...Break-Up really makes me down..im lost...dunno what to do..i become the hater...i become EMO.. i get drunk just to make all that pain go...and for the 1st time also i can drink beer that much..its feels like i just drinks a juice..crazy rite...Honestly, the break-up really effect my life..i started to hate myself...i feel like wanna be someone else...
im hopeless for almost 7 month..all i thinks is my past...i always say im moving on but still i pretend about it..and for the 1st time i feel the pain of break-up...and its haunted me for almost a years start end of 2009...
Huh! thats life..not all our dreams will come true...and i believe that theres always a reasons for all that..maybe God wanna let someone else come to our life which is better than ourselves.. Now he have someone else so do i..kekadang bila fikir balik semua kejadian yang berlaku terasa bersyukur juga lar walaupun kesakitan tu masih terasa...bersyukur kerna ia mengajar saya untuk memaafkan...menerima seseorang itu seadanya..kebaikan & keburukan...belajar menerima pandangan orang terhadap diri sendiri...that's the advantage i got from the Break-up..
Honestly i cant never forget everything..and i would not forgeting it..i'll keep all the memories & pain in the other side of my book stories...dan dengan rasminya saya menutup Buku itu..and i will keep it at some place that no one can reach..biarla semua yang terjadi menjadi rasiah antara saya, dia & Tuhan...All i can do is just pray for His happiness with his loves one..
This years also i got so many frens..i know a lot of different people...Thanks to all members of The Frontier Clubs ( sudah di bubarkan) & De' Nameless.. You all makes me who i am..knowing you all is a precious gift i ever got..for the 1st time also i got Friends that much..hang out with you all was my happy moment...you all teach me to be more confident, cheerfull and little bit talkactive even i know i still the silent one...hee... i really cant change that one...and in that one Group also i meet my Love one..hee...itu nanti la cerita...skijap lagi..hahaha..!
To Sharbby & Hatinreh...you know what 2010 is our 1st year aniversary..i wanna thanks both of them for still walking with me in my life...the one who i shared a lot of my secrets...the one who i shared all my pain...the one i shared all my happy moments...really thankfull to God coz He let me meet this two beautiful ladies and become my BFF..i love them like i love my family...they are my Sisters..! and it will be till the end of my life...thats my promise..!
Mei 2010 juga saya kena langkah bendul..hee..know wht its mean???..its mean my youngers sister get engaged early than me so mean i got FREE gold ring...and thats means people wont stop asking for me to find someone..its mean BOYFRIEND!!...hahahah...honestly, that time i never ever think about it..never cross my mind pun..so everytime they ask i just say " sabar bah, palan2..ndak lama juga ni..." hahaha..! ingat senang ka cari boyfriend...the break-up still haunted me that time...Mum also cant stop asking me to meet her friend's son..wakakkaka! im not that kind...i rather find it by myself than being arrange by others..i know what want..hee
Sept 2010 is my 2nd years with Zuma Engineering Sdn. Bhd..honestly i says i feel boring..i feel wanna Quit and find another jobs next year..the staff was awesome but i just dont like the jobs..i need something yang adventure skit...not just sit, pick up the phone and surfing internet..wasting time only...i'll move next year..when?? dunno yet but for sure i'll do that..need new environment for new year..hee
And the most important things that happen this years is meeting MR. RONALD...the one that catch my heart again..the one that open back my feels...the one that cheers back my mood but the good things that he do is He make me FALL IN LOVE again...at 20th September 2010 he says He Love me...and He officially become my Boyfriend..! what a life..! and i become happy again..i forgot my past...and i totally forgive my Ex..! and today we've been together for 3 month, 1 week & 2 days...still early but im serious with this relationship now..its different from the others..ans im really sure about this...even its not good hoping too much still i want to do it..coz i know im deeply in love with him...Hopefully it will be longer this time...coz i wanna be more serious than before..
New Year?? suddenly its catch my mind...new resolution?? i already have it..and i really wanna makes it happen this time...i just feel unpatient to meet 2011 even i feel little bit scared..hee...normal ma kan? hahahha..! i wish a big gift next year..more money!! hahhaa..! more healthy...i dont want to have that Red eyes again..panat eehh!! spoiling my mood only...and of kos more LOVE..especially to my Family and to you Si Hubby!!!..REMEMBER that you should love me as much as i am and plus your love to me..hee..cam na tu arr??? bingung!! hahhaa..! - One thing you should know is I LOVE U MORE everyday!!! i hope you too feel the same..God bless us till Death!! Amen!! - Im hoping for THE PLAN..
Apa2 pun.. Dengan rasminya pada jam 4.00am ini.. saya RAIN menutup segala cerita sedih , lucu & Gembira saya pada 2010...sila nantikan kemunculan saya pada Tahun Depan iaitu 2011..
" WISH YOU ALL HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011" - may that year bring you all More bless, more healthy, More Love & happiness to your LOVE ONES ( Family + BFF )
p/s : 31st i'll celebrate the countdown with Him & His family..1st meeting them..hee...nervous juga lar..just wait and see...will update tou you all later..!
